John thought. “I tried a new flavor of yogurt last Tuesday. Strawberry.”
The Blondes had vanished, leaving only a glittery note: “Lesson learned? Good. Now go teach someone else.”
“I’m fine,” John said, clutching his emergency packet of wet wipes. 2 Hot Blondes The Lesson John Persons
They spent the next three hours dismantling John’s life.
The lesson was held in an abandoned roller rink. Neon lights flickered. A bass thrummed through the floor. Saffron, sharp and witty, wore a sequined jumpsuit. Honey, softer but equally wild, balanced on a unicycle while juggling rubber chickens. John thought
That was before the Blondes.
“John Persons,” Saffron said, reading his name off a lanyard. “Your energy is screaming for help.” The lesson was held in an abandoned roller rink
John had never heard of them. He’d only won their seminar ticket in a raffle he entered by accident, thinking it was for a free set of non-stick frying pans.
Not “blondes” as in a hair color. The Blondes —a duo named Saffron and Honey, who ran a traveling pop-up seminar called “Unlocking Your Inner Chaos: A Lesson in Living Loud.” They were famous on social media for glitter-bombing stuffy boardrooms and teaching CEOs to dance the macarena during quarterly earnings calls.