Neighbors 2010-02: Naughty

As the groundhog prepares to make his annual prediction, perhaps the only forecast that matters is this: the naughty neighbor isn’t going anywhere. He’s out there now, revving his snowblower at 6:30 a.m. on a Saturday. The only question is – what are you going to do about it?

There’s – the guy in the split-level who believes his new 1,200-watt subwoofer is a public good. At 11 p.m. on a Tuesday, as you’re trying to wind down from a 10-hour shift, his living room becomes a nightclub. The drywall vibrates. Your toddler cries. He yells, “It’s not even 11:30 yet!”

Welcome to the suburban battleground of 2010. Forget terrorism and economic recovery. For millions of Americans, the real front line of daily stress is the six feet of grass separating their home from the next. And a new term has entered the lexicon to describe the culprits: the . The Sins Next Door What exactly makes a neighbor “naughty” in 2010? It’s a sliding scale of passive-aggressive terror. Naughty Neighbors 2010-02

There’s – the family with four cars, a boat, and a recreational vehicle, all of which occupy the street in front of your house, leaving you to park three blocks away in February slush.

Pass the earplugs. And the plat map. This feature was originally conceived as a slice of suburban cultural observation for early 2010, reflecting the anxieties and irritations of the post-recession era. As the groundhog prepares to make his annual

Additionally, the rise of online forums (think early Reddit, neighborhood message boards on Craigslist, and angry comments on Patch.com) has given vent to a new kind of digital rage. Anonymous posts titled “Does anyone else hate the people at 1423 Maple?” are becoming a guilty pleasure. One user, “FedUpInFairfax,” writes: “She lets her cat poop in my flowerbed. I bought a motion-activated sprinkler. Am I the villain?” The consensus? No. She’s the naughty neighbor. The naughty neighbor phenomenon isn’t just about one-off annoyances. It’s a dynamic. It escalates.

But the most insidious is . This is the neighbor who waits until you leave for work, then hires a contractor to pave, plant, or build six inches onto your side of the plat map. By the time you notice the new shed’s shadow falling on your azaleas, the concrete is dry. “Oh,” they’ll say, eyes wide with practiced innocence. “We thought that old survey was wrong.” The 2010 Context: Why Now? Why is this behavior spiking in the winter of 2010? Two words: Economic anxiety . The only question is – what are you going to do about it

February 2010 – The snow has melted just enough to reveal what’s been hiding since December: a collection of dog waste bags tossed into the azaleas, a garden gnome now decapitated, and a newly installed chain-link fence that cuts three feet into a neighboring property line.